This week begins Gay Pride month, when we recognize and affirm the LGBTQIA folks who are our friends, coworkers, family members, and fellow citizens. We are in a difficult era with state and local governments, as well as the Trump Administration, having passed and enacted policies restricting the basic human rights of LGBT people, even to the point of denying basic medical assistance for some. Even in the best of times, life is not easy for LGBT folks, but we are in a  time that  is exceedingly stressful for many. A personal friend who identifies as queer put it this way:

“For so long, and so commonly, we fight just to be recognized as human beings. We fight for our dignity. Oftentimes, we are met with such resistance that the fight for the bare minimum is exhausting. It can feel draining and deflate our hope. For many queer people, especially when we find ourselves isolated, that hope to fight depletes quickly. It can be hard to keep going.”

The love of God includes acceptance of all people, as they are, with no boundaries to love. Given the ongoing struggle so many queer folks experience, I choose not to look away, but to join in their struggle

My Story of Transformation

I confess that I have not always thought that way. During the 16 years I was an American Baptist pastor, I could not wholeheartedly embrace the theological position that condemned the LGBT lifestyle, but neither was I fully open to it. When asked where I stood on LGBT issues, I tried to take a neutral position. I would reply: “I am kicking that question upstairs for God to figure out. ” Even so, in taking that “neutral” position, I was holding up the status quo, which regarded LGBT folks as morally inferior.

I  served as a pastor in the 1980s and early 1990s when the AIDS epidemic was ravaging the country. My wife, who was a social worker during that period, primarily worked with people who had contracted AIDS, many of whom were gay men. In those early days, people with AIDS often died within 3-4 years of being diagnosed with the disease. It was a difficult and draining job. Her dedication to this group of suffering people made an impact on me. Like anyone, she modeled that LGBT folks deserved to be cared for, and that is what she did.

About five years after leaving the pastorate, I joined a Mennonite Church that was wrestling with whether they should become a “welcoming and affirming” church to people in the LGBTQ community. As a congregation, we grappled with the question: Should we welcome LGBT folks to become members of the church, and were we open to their serving in leadership roles? During a year of congregational discernment, I came to a place where I affirmed and welcomed LGBT folks as full participants in the life of our congregation in every way.

Shortly after that decision, our church was forced to leave the regional conference were part of it because they refused to allow our pastor to officiate in same sex marriages. Fortunately, we were able to find another conference that affirmed our welcoming and affirming stance. Today, the Mennonites as a denomination are deeply divided on the issue of LGBT inclusion, and this has led to splits in churches, regional conferences, and the national Mennonite denomination as a whole.

I recognize that for many people who have suffered discrimination and condemnation for their sexual orientation, the fact that it took me so long to come around to a fully affirming position must be deeply troubling and a source of frustration and anger. I accept that anger and criticism. I do not share my story for any accolades, but rather to say that despite the current negativity and oppression faced by gay, trans, lesbian, and queer folks, those like me who did not accept the gay community can change have their attitudes and be transformed. I changed, and so can others.

For those who are still resistant or hesitant to accept LGBT folks into our churches and in our lives, I encourage you to remember all the folks that Jesus accepted and embraced who were considered “unclean” in first-century Jewish culture. Jesus did not see them as “unclean” but cleared the way for them to be fully acceptable in that culture. Despite all the Christian talk against LGBT inclusion, Jesus never said anything about people who were gay or lesbian. Instead, he called us to welcome the stranger and love those rejected by his society.

Pride Month is a reminder that God’s Spirit is not through with any of us yet and continues to work on our attitudes and perspectives. For this we can give thanks and offer our support to our LGBT siblings during this special month and beyond.